Act of Faith

It would appear that the back pain was not permanent, which is a good thing. Just had one day/night of excruciating pain followed by a weekend of occasional twinges.

It's a funny thing, this pregnancy lark. Half the time I feel like I'm making it up. It's far too early for movement (other than trapped wind and the like) or anything approaching a real bump. The only actual hard evidence I have is those pregnancy tests - which I took now about five weeks ago. Anything could have happened since then. Sure, I haven't had a period and have been having bouts of extreme tiredness and waves of passing nausea interspersed with desperate hunger, but that mostly sounds like me on a normal day. What if I've got it all terribly wrong? That would be gutting.

That said, I am finding it increasingly hard to deny that my breasts (already a hefty 34DD/E) are doing their utmost to bust out of my bras. And over literally the last three days, I noticed something approaching a teeny, tiny little rounding of the tummy. Of course, both of these things can be achieved by a concerted eating of pie (in which I have most definitely been indulging), although the tummy action does feel sort of tight rather than squadgey - not unlike trapped wind. I got a friend to take a picture of it yesterday, in the interests of documenting my transformation into giant belly monster, although the lighting makes me look more like a slightly tubby 'actress' in a somewhat dubious soft-core porno, rather than an 11-week-pregnant woman.

I have my first appointment with the midwife a week today then the Monday after that it's scan time (v exciting) so if all that goes according to plan, and I'm not just imagining the whole thing, then I can go public very soon.

For the first time today, I gave in to nausea, extreme exhaustion, a bit of a headache and a burgeoning cold to call in sick. It hasn't been quite the relaxing day off I hoped for, as I have spent most of it sneezing my head off and being moderately disgusted by my bogeys. But it's probably done me good. I think I've done well to make it through almost my entire first trimester without having a day off until now.

On the advice of a friend, I bought a random bundle of maternity tops on ebay today, 15 quid for seven. In theory, they should be my size and they look quite wearable in the pictures. We shall see if that was money down the drain when they arrive...